No Contact Rule

ExBackExpertise
9 min readAug 25, 2021

In this post, we will discuss the no contact rule and how to apply it in various scenarios.

The no-contact rule refers to ceasing all contact with an ex after a breakup, and it is the most effective way for moving on from an ex. No contact should be avoided for at least 60 days, and this includes no texting, phoning, or conversing on social media. When you are still trying to get over a breakup, it may seem like an excessive step, but the reality is that breaking off contact with an ex is the quickest, most successful method to fully move on. Here’s all you need to know about the process of no contact after a breakup.

https://exbackexpertise.com/no-contact-rule/

What Is The No Contact Rule?

When it comes to breaking up with an ex and making it last, the No Contact rule is sometimes the best way to proceed. “The No Contact rule states that after a breakup, you do not call, text, or message an ex in any way. It involves avoiding talking about them or the breakup with their friends or relatives.

The No Contact rule is so powerful because it allows you to sit with your sadness and scars without having to fill any gaps or feel broken with someone else. In traumatic breakups, the loss may be so tangible that we will do everything to alleviate the agony in the present moment, even if that current action causes more long-term misery. When you go no-contact, you may appropriately accept and mourn a loss, and finally make room for something new.

If you keep messaging your ex all the time and nothing feels that different from before the breakup, it is easy to delude yourself into thinking you will get back together. However, as Wade points out, such temporary relief might be detrimental in the long run.

https://exbackexpertise.medium.com/will-ex-forget-me-during-no-contact-8b0f761b0623

Believe me when I say that denying to yourself that the relationship was not functioning is not going to help you. Moving on, on the other hand, might be lot simpler if you begin to live without their presence in your life. Wade also claims that the No Contact rule can assist you in moving beyond diverting and comforting to feeling and transforming your sorrow.

While it might assist in the short term, you will ultimately need to process the breakup and figure out what occurred.

Breakups are fraught with conflicting emotions, and the no contact rule is no exception.

https://exbackexpertise.medium.com/how-long-does-it-take-for-an-ex-to-miss-you-with-no-contact-16eb9b640ec2

How long should no contact rule last?

The No Contact Rule should be in effect for at least 30 days.

What should you do if there is no contact?

Enjoy your life. Make every effort to make yourself feel better. Make yourself your best friend and take care of yourself since no one else will. When there is no contact, this is the time to work on being a happier and more confident person. But keep in mind that you should not be doing it only to get your ex back. You should do it if you want to become a better version of yourself.

You must realize that you do not need your ex to be happy. In fact, you do not even need your ex. You may desire things, but you do not require them. There is a significant difference between desiring and requiring something.

https://exbackexpertise.medium.com/does-the-no-contact-rule-work-if-you-were-dumped-ec9d95002d25

Of course, this shift in viewpoint does not occur by itself. You will not feel better about yourself if you laze around all day watching TV and eating ice cream. As a result, there are four types of activities that must be done during the definite no contact rule.

Now comes the healing… Julie Snelling’s response May I use parts from this information on my own Facebook page, “Narcissistic Abuse Recovery”?

The Restricted No-Contact Rule The Indefinite No Contact Rule I am not going to sit here and describe a typical no contact rule because this entire resource is dedicated to giving you all of the ins and outs of it.

But, because of my love for him, he wanted to see me, and we did see one other a few times after that.

I was skeptical, but I though I could manage it because I am older and more experienced, with high emotional intelligence and maturity, as well as a wealth of relationship experience.

Will he move on during no contact?

How do you know if no contact is working?

Why is the no contact rule so effective?

The No-Contact Rule is one of life’s unavoidable annoyances. No one loves it, especially the brokenhearted, yet it is very much unavoidable if you want to truly recover after a difficult breakup. It is critical to allow your heart to heal by not speaking to, seeing, messaging, sleeping with, emailing, or exchanging Morse code with your ex. It is like a detox, clearing away all the grief, resentment, and sexual tension that is keeping you from embarking on the next chapter of your life.

https://exbackexpertise.medium.com/does-no-contact-work-if-your-ex-is-seeing-someone-else-5f28f9176fad

Some ladies debate with me about why they should keep in contact with an ex. In most of these situations, I do not believe these ladies are attempting to persuade me. In my experience, the more a person resists the No-Contact Rule, the more they need to adhere to it. So, unless your divorce is really amicable, which generally implies you do not want to employ a breakup counselor, you should definitely consider it. It hurts like hell at first, but it is for the best in the long run. It is the same as pulling off a Band-Aid.

The no contact rule is described as a period of time during which you do not contact your ex (or a toxic individual) in order to give both of you some space and time apart.

However, it is critical to recognize that the no-contact rule by itself will not help you re-establish a good connection with your ex.

No contact is intended to help you recover and grow as a person so that you may re-enter a healthy and long-term relationship with your ex.

This is the most difficult process (emotional healing) I have ever encountered.

The Male Mind During No Contact

Will no contact work if he lost feelings?

We have discovered that the bulk of our clientele have been dumped.

When you think about it, a breakup is simply one side believing they can outperform the other, thus this stage makes perfect sense.

If your ex is the one who decides to end the relationship, they are likely to feel pleased with their decision at first.

This may be devastating to hear since you are hoping they are as upset as you are, and they may be, but not always.

It takes time for devastation to occur.

The Power of Silence After Break Up

So, as much as I would like to sit here and tell you a precise time frame down to the minute of when our clients would experience success, it is too erratic to do so.

Great things do not happen overnight.

Following the typical period of calm following a breakup, they are confronted with a sense of impending doom.

This usually happens when they discover you have not contacted them in a while.

The consequences of the no contact rule may be observed here. Only when they notice something is wrong do they get concerned.

It is unusual for you not to react or pick up the phone.

You do not have to get into a relationship right soon, but a few dates will give you an ego boost that will surely assist in the long term.

What will he be thinking during no contact?

Why no contact is so important with a narcissist?

How long does it take for an ex to miss you with no contact?

source: https://youtu.be/C_F_oLv1xh4

It is more difficult to get over someone or have them get over you if you are still in contact with them. Your future is in front of you, not behind you. To go forward, you must be willing to let go.

Friendship should never be offered or accepted as a consolation prize.

Often, the individual leaving a relationship may offer remaining “friends” in order to avoid feeling like the “bad guy.” They truly do not wish to be your buddy. Their goal is that if you realize on some level that the end is not truly the end, you would stress out less.

Friendship usually provides the injured person false optimism that there may be a chance for reconciliation if they remain close.

Exes may find themselves having sex in some cases. The injured person feels they are reuniting, but the ex sees it as merely sex.

You are likely to feel exploited and upset if you discover your ex regarded the sexual contact as a “friends with benefits” arrangement.

It is unreasonable to expect them to go from red-hot lovers to immediate platonic buddies resembling siblings. Your ex is the last person who can assist you in moving on from them, and vice versa.

Be wary of zombies.

Almost everyone has an ex who, in a metaphorical sense, refuses to die. They appear out of nowhere every few weeks or months, like a zombie.

https://exbackexpertise.medium.com/how-long-should-no-contact-last-cbe88dfbec98

I realize it may come as a surprise to those of you who are aware with what other experts prescribe, but there is a reason why I believe a no contact period should never be greater than 45 days.

What happens after 30 day no contact rule?

Why do narcissists come back after no contact?

Does silence make a man miss you?

Do exes come back after no contact?

Sex in a relationship floods the body with oxytocin and dopamine, the body’s “feel-good” hormones. Euphoria frequently causes you to become engrossed in imagination.

After a relationship ends, the no-contact rule serves as a detox to bring you back to reality. You see your ex for who they are, not what you want them to be. Are they self-centered? Cowardly? Is he a liar? A narcissist who is emotionally immature? As your eyes are opened to reality, you will be able to make better decisions about when a relationship is truly a solid long-term investment. A long-term commitment is no laughing matter, therefore you want a healthy and solid spouse along for the journey.

Will No Contact Make Him Move On

During the no-contact time, you must take some activity in order to become a better version of yourself.

What proportion of ex-partners return after a period of no contact?

Is he missing me when we are not in contact

Is it too late to refrain from making contact after begging?

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